Losing Face: A Personal Growth Challenge?

We all have that person in our close or digital circle. How do we perceive the wall that is "the other"? Whether it's reflective obscurantism or pride, isn't the inner question for many simply about not losing face? It's amusing to see how some people, in order to avoid feeling out of place, avoid feeling devalued, avoid self-questioning, or avoid admitting their errors in reasoning in front of everyone, double down on their foolishness by pretending not to see or hear. It’s the waiting room of circular communication.

But this also applies, for different reasons, to lies—whether it’s an isolated event or a pathological liar. However, the mechanism differs since the latter seeks to present themselves as better than they are.

And holding on at all costs, no longer listening, no longer responding, no longer participating in the debate—this avoidance (what we call "ignorance" today to avoid losing face) becomes their only solution.

They stick to their posture, their role, their narrative as defenders of a given issue while carefully avoiding engaging with other viewpoints or alternative reasoning on the matter—regardless of the arguments presented. It’s as if there were a real personal value at stake, as if evolving one’s thinking was a sign of being foolish.

However, this cannot advance one’s own thinking, nor inspire others, nor improve human intelligence, and certainly not the debate.

It brings no benefits, except for the individual, who can continue seeing themselves through others’ eyes in the way they desire, thus maintaining the illusion.