One of the most common experiences for highly gifted individuals (HPI) in the professional world is dealing with boredom. However, this is not exclusive to them; it is also common among multipotential individuals. Here, I am specifically referring to a type of boredom that is overwhelming, unbearable, and extremely burdensome, whereas most people might feel bored but manage to cope by telling themselves things like, "Work can't be fun every day," or "It will get better tomorrow" — in short, those who accept it and move on.

Due to their ability to learn quickly and solve complex problems, HPIs can find themselves mastering tasks much faster than their colleagues, getting to grips with an activity in just a few days or even hours. Once this stage is reached, they can quickly lose interest in their work, leading to a deep, persistent sense of boredom that becomes debilitating because it takes up too much mental space.

This boredom can be a real obstacle to professional success and affect their perception of what is possible. In an environment where intellectual challenges are scarce, an HPI may feel underutilized, which can lead to a loss of motivation and a constant search for new professional opportunities.

Intellectual stimulation is therefore essential, not only to maintain their interest but also to feel accomplished in their work. For an HPI, professional success could be defined by the ability to find engaging and stimulating challenges and to recognize and accept the small, meaningful achievements of everyday life when the "big picture" is sorely lacking.

What does it truly mean to succeed? Is success measured solely by tangible achievements, those that also allows a certain lifestyle? Or is it something more subtle, deeply rooted in what you feel at every stage of your journey? Is it tied to your perception of it? Are perceptions controllable, and to what end?

How can this reflection help you recalibrate your perspectives, and more importantly, your criteria for making choices?

The goal here is not to offer a definitive, prescriptive answer, but rather to encourage analysis and questioning within each of us. The context is to explore professional success by separating it from the broader concept of personal success, which would require a much more detailed examination.

Have you ever wondered what, in your life, allows or will allow you to say, "Yes, I’ve succeeded"? Or perhaps another phrase along those lines? Is it that moment when you reach a goal, when you accomplish a project that is close to your heart? Or is it the sense of inner satisfaction that emerges when you know that what you have achieved holds meaning for you? Or could it be something else entirely?

Because, let’s face it, many well-meaning people have their own ideas about what success is and are eager to convince us of them, it is crucial to foster critical thinking on this topic.

Can we even consider success as a universal concept? Is it detached from an individual’s personal values?

Let’s return to the question of external indicators of success—those that society values: a thriving career, material possessions that can be showcased, the recognition of one’s peers, etc. (this list is not exhaustive). Are these sufficient measures of your success? Or do you sometimes feel that, even with all these markers of success, something is missing—or might be missing—an intangible element that eludes these visible criteria?

Perhaps success is not only found in what we do, but in how we experience what we do. Do you feel accomplished when you reach a goal, or is it the journey itself that sustains you, that gives you the sense of being on the right path? Is success, then, a state of consciousness and realization to be achieved, or is it a perpetual journey that slips away the moment we think we have reached it?

Is external recognition necessary to validate this feeling, or does your own perception suffice to give you that sense of accomplishment?

How can you work on your perceptions?

Working on your perceptions is simple; it’s about seeing the glass as half full rather than half empty.

What benefits might you gain from this?

Envisioning success may also mean accepting that it doesn’t always conform to societal norms, that it can be envisioned outside of any imposed framework. It is, above all, a personal matter, an inner dialogue between your aspirations, emotions, values, and the way you perceive your own achievements. And in this sense, is success a feeling, perhaps an intuition, an intimate sentiment that only you can truly understand, whispering to you that, despite the challenges and doubts, you have found and realized what truly matters?

Ultimately, creating a success plan might be an illusion. It could be what sometimes prevents you, when defining a career, from diving into an invitation to explore what, deep down, defines your own sense of having succeeded.

As we discussed in a previous article, the need for meaning at work is obviously not a criterion specific to the gifted, despite what you might often hear. Meaning is just a small part of what you truly need.

Many gifted individuals are driven by desire (and this isn’t unique to them either), which serves as a crucial motivator. However, there is something fundamental that is truly specific to the gifted: emotion.

You need emotions to feel every achievement, even the smallest ones. A thrill, something that, in an instant, transports you, even if it’s fleeting. You need that rush of adrenaline tied to a particular accomplishment, which rarely happens. Ideally, you need it regularly. And I’m not prescribing this, but simply describing it. That said, reflect on it or try it out, and you’ll see if this prescription makes sense.

This brings me to the concept of meaning because, in my opinion, the almost magical trio for the gifted in their daily life, whether at work or elsewhere, consists of the following:

Meaning + Desire + Emotion

Of course, you can analyze this need, this resource. But remember, we’re focusing on the context of work—whether paid or unpaid, whether it’s about successfully completing a complicated new project or finding the idea that gives a whole new perspective to a task.

This emotion tied to accomplishment—where does it come from within you? What does it stem from?

To help you and guide you in your own introspection, we can delve deeper into the context:

• Is it tied to another value, such as correcting an injustice?
• Is it simply connected to letting go, as in a sport where you stop thinking, where you unplug your brain just enough to catch your breath, or when you finally achieve a specific result or performance?

I’ll leave you to continue exploring…

We often read in literature, blogs, and hear in podcasts that gifted individuals are in a perpetual search for meaning, that they need it, and so on. It’s practically the prescription handed out by all the so-called experts: if you weren’t already aware, finding meaning in your work will finally set your mind free, and you’ll become fulfilled! I won’t rehash all the well-worn phrases, but you get the idea…

Something doesn’t quite add up for me. What exactly, in this need that’s been so carefully explained to you, or in this prescription, is truly specific to the gifted?

Is it really only gifted individuals who need work that has meaning?

This notion is utterly absurd. Everyone has been seeking meaning in their work for a long time now. Just ask any of your colleagues around you.

And if we broaden the question, to avoid limiting it to the context of career guidance, and instead focus not on the need but on the question of meaning in a more global sense. By examining the processes at play in perception, we realize that the creation of meaning is an uncontrollable and immutable process of the brain. Human beings create meaning at every moment from the world around them, whether they are gifted or not.

Take a simple example from everyday life: you receive a text from your child that says, "I’ll be home soon." You immediately start thinking about where they are, where they’re saying they’re returning from. Then, you’ll probably wonder what time they’ll be home since it’s not specified, and possibly whether they’ll be alone or not (depending on the context…).

Beyond any discussion of communication analysis and inferences, you’re searching for meaning, and you’re creating meaning.

No, the need for meaning in work is not something unique to the gifted. However, they do have other needs that are specific to them, and that will be the subject of another article.

Career exploration for children and young adolescents is a process that ideally requires thoughtful and extended preparation. Starting as early as 8 to 10 years old, children begin to think about the careers they might want to pursue and why. It’s essential at this stage to encourage and guide them to discover their interests, build confidence, and consider multiple paths for their future without unnecessary pressure.

Approach the Topic as a World of Possibilities

To foster reflection, you can implement various strategies, but I’ve highlighted a few that are relatively easy to apply:

1.     Encourage Self-Discovery: It's important to start by helping your child understand themselves better. Encourage them to explore diverse activities, passions, and interests through various extracurricular activities like clubs, sports, or the arts. These experiences can reveal hidden talents and natural preferences. However, it’s crucial to engage in discussions about what they genuinely enjoy about these activities.

2.     Emphasize the Importance of School Subjects: Explain to your child how the subjects they study in school can translate into knowledge and skills for future careers. For example, mathematics could lead to careers in science or engineering, while history might lead to careers in teaching or research. Emphasize thinking about a career and an activity, not just a field of study or a specific path. Thinking about a career is about orientation; thinking about a path is about fitting in.

3.     Foster Curiosity and Questioning: Encourage your child to ask questions about the jobs they encounter daily. What is the general activity, and why? Can they imagine what the daily routine might be like? These discussions can help them understand the diversity of existing professions and broaden their perspectives.

4.     Involve Your Child in Practical Experiences: Everyday experiences around you are opportunities to talk about different careers, from the grocery store to the bank to a birthday at the go-kart track. Additionally, internships or job shadowing opportunities later on, provide concrete ways for your child to learn about various professions. These on-the-ground experiences are invaluable for giving a visual and environmental understanding of the work and refining their desires to envision careers that attract them.

5.     Promote Gradual Reflection: It’s essential to remind your child that they don’t need to know exactly what they want to do right away. The important thing is to stay curious, explore, think about possibilities, and not hesitate to change their mind as they discover more.

6.     Guidance from a Career Coach: If you feel your child needs more structured support to clarify their ideas and set an objective that naturally motivates them to invest in their schoolwork and improve their grades, coaching might be the solution. This type of personalized guidance helps your child structure their thoughts, build confidence in their choices, and advance calmly in developing and creating their career project.

Alternatively, my self-coaching manual "Choose Your Career in 5 Days" can be a good starting point, but individualized follow-up brings an additional dimension, structure, and explanations for those who need it.

School bullying is no longer confined to the walls of the school; I've even written an article to help children deal with these events. With the advent of digital technologies, it has also moved online, taking the form of cyberbullying, cyber discrimination, and cyber harassment. This type of bullying can be just as devastating, if not more insidious, as it follows the child into their private life without any adult being able to notice unless they are vigilant.

Raising Awareness About Cyberbullying

The first step in protecting your child from cyberbullying is to make them aware of the dangers online. Explain to them what cyberbullying is, how it manifests, and why it is so harmful. Discuss the inappropriate behaviors they might encounter, such as insults, threats, or public humiliation on social media.

Ensure your child knows never to share personal information online and to use privacy settings to limit access to their profiles.

It goes without saying that sharing photos of themselves, as well as the trend of selfies or TikTok videos, can also be a ticking time bomb.

Developing Responsible Digital Skills

Teach your child to use digital technologies responsibly and intelligently. This includes adopting respectful online behavior, never participating in cyberbullying, even indirectly, and standing up for victims when they witness such behavior while reporting these issues.

Encourage them to think before posting anything online, considering the possible consequences. By teaching them to evaluate the impact of their digital actions, you help them protect themselves and others.

There is also another aspect that only parents can fully grasp: the unimaginable importance of their future digital life for recruiters who already scrutinize all public and even private accounts of their future employees. What they post today will be their business card tomorrow.

This article doesn't aim to delve into the impact of screens and social media on young people's and adolescents' brains, so I'll stop there on this topic.

Identifying Online Sources of Support

Just as in school, it’s important for your child to know who to turn to if they become a victim of cyberbullying. Explain how to block bullies on social media and how to report inappropriate behavior to the relevant platforms.

But it doesn't stop there; platforms don't always have the diligence required to handle these issues properly.

Make sure they understand that you are there to support them and that they should always inform you if they encounter problems online. You can also reach out to teachers or school counselors to keep them informed and to intervene if necessary, especially when they form WhatsApp groups even though it's prohibited by the school.

Strengthening Self-Esteem in the Face of Cyberbullying

Cyberbullying can have the same devastating effects on a child's self-esteem as any other form of bullying. It's crucial to support them by regularly reminding them of their worth and praising their accomplishments in a measured way.

Encourage them to focus on their passions and surround themselves with positive people who support them and treat them as they believe people should be treated, reinforcing their human values. Activities outside of school, such as sports or the arts, can also be an excellent way to boost their self-confidence.

Implementing Online Avoidance Strategies

Teach your child to recognize the early warning signs of cyberbullying and to avoid online interactions that could escalate. This includes not responding to provocations and walking away from discussions where they feel attacked.

However, sometimes some individuals target classmates without them even being present in the discussion groups or aware of it. This is where having a close and loving group of friends can make all the difference by acting as regulators or alert signals.

It’s also important for them to understand that walking away from a toxic situation is not a sign of weakness but a strategy for self-protection. This is only the beginning of their learning to define the character of the people they welcome into their circle of friends, so it's important to help them without passing judgments that might push them away. To do this, it may be preferable to adopt a questioning posture to get them to reflect so that they come to certain conclusions on their own, which is often the most effective approach.

Maintaining Continuous Vigilance

Online bullying can be difficult to detect as it often occurs out of sight of adults. Stay vigilant by monitoring your child's use of technology and regularly discussing their online experiences. Some parental control tools exist, but they are not enough.

Be attentive to signs of distress, such as reluctance to use social media or sudden mood changes after being online. Continue to encourage open communication and ensure your child knows they can always come to you with anything that bothers them. The more you are caring and open to dialogue about the solutions to implement, the more likely they are to open up. Yes, it’s easier said than done.

Of course, I could have sensationalized the points discussed, but I thought it was more important to focus on the basics of the solutions to be implemented to anticipate, rather than falling into sensationalism or fear-mongering.

School bullying is a painful reality for many children, with sometimes severe consequences on their psychological, emotional, and academic well-being. As a parent, it is essential to know how to help your child respond appropriately to protect themselves and overcome these challenges.

Creating an Open Communication Environment

The first key step in helping your child manage school bullying is to establish an atmosphere of trust where they feel safe sharing their experiences. This is not only important for them, but it is crucial for you, as it is one of the few ways to stay informed about what they are going through.

Encourage them to talk about their school day, interactions with classmates, and be attentive to signs of distress, such as reluctance to go to school or mood changes. Helping them distinguish between positive interactions and problematic or toxic ones is essential. They need to recognize what is normal and what isn’t, even if they already feel something is wrong. Bringing it to their awareness is an important step.

Ask open-ended questions and listen actively. For example: "Is there anything at school that bothers you right now?" or "How are things going with the other kids?" It’s better to avoid an approach with a leading question that might push them into a situation that might not exist, just to probe, like: "Who is bothering you right now, and what are they doing?" This indirect approach can be problematic and does not establish a trusting environment.

It is crucial that your child knows they can speak freely about their concerns without fear of being judged or misunderstood.

Another important point is that children often hesitate to talk because they fear it will blow the situation out of proportion. In their minds, beyond their concern about how you might react, this could mean you talking to the principal, teachers, or supervisors, leading to a confrontation with their aggressors. They might worry about being labeled as a "snitch," which could exacerbate an already painful situation.

You must foster a dialogue that assures them they will be heard and supported without judgment. Emphasize that your role is to help and protect them, but you need their help to do so effectively by keeping you informed. While this might lead to some temporary complications, reassure them that it is a necessary step toward improving the situation. It’s also important that they understand that this is the only way to ensure that the situation changes and that the bullying stops. You can help them verbalize and consider different scenarios to visualize the various actions and possible consequences. Finally, ask them, "What could happen if we do nothing?" and "What can we expect if we take action?"

Teaching Assertiveness

One of the most effective ways to protect your child from bullying is to teach them to assert themselves. Assertiveness means clearly expressing boundaries without being aggressive. Encourage them to use confident body language and respond calmly but firmly to provocations. They need to appear strong, in control of their emotions, and not intimidated by others’ attempts to bully them. Simply ignoring the provocations and humiliations when they start isn’t enough to stop the process, which could end badly. They need to project an image and communicate appropriately.

Practicing scenarios at home can help prepare them for difficult situations. For example, if they are mocked, they might say, "Stop, I don’t like that," or "Leave me alone." They could follow up with: "Do you think you’re clever, huh?" or "Your threats don’t scare me," or even "I never give in to blackmail." These simple phrases can help them regain control of the situation. If these strategies don’t change anything, the trust and communication you’ve established will allow you to gauge the seriousness of the situation.

Identifying Sources of Support at School

It is crucial for your child to know they are not alone and that there are adults at school who can help. Make sure they know the right people to approach, such as a teacher, school counselor, or supervisor.

Sometimes, your child might tell you they don’t speak up because they believe the adults won’t do anything, possibly because they’ve heard stories or experienced injustices that lead them to think it’s pointless.

This is when you need to explain that how the adults handle the situation is beyond their control and not their responsibility. However, informing them puts the responsibility on the adults and prevents them from denying any knowledge of the issue later on. It’s also important to tell them that for these adults to understand the situation's evolution, they need to be continuously informed about everything that happens. Even if they don’t initially pay attention, they will likely act if the situation persists or becomes chronic.

Explain the importance of reporting any bullying incident immediately. Remind them that asking for help is not a weakness but a way to protect themselves and others. Ask them how they would feel if it happened to their best friends or someone they care about.

Strengthening Self-Esteem

Bullying can have devastating effects on your child’s self-esteem. To counter this, it is essential to regularly remind them of their qualities and achievements, linked to their ability to improve and make efforts to succeed. Encourage them to participate in extracurricular activities that they enjoy and where they can excel within another group of peers, whether it’s sports, arts, or any other passion.

These activities will help them build self-confidence and create a circle of friends with similar interests, strengthening their sense of belonging and security.

Implementing Avoidance Strategies

Sometimes, the best response to certain types of bullying is to avoid it. Teach your child to recognize potentially dangerous situations and avoid areas where they could be vulnerable, without dramatizing, such as deserted hallways or isolated bathrooms. Suggest they stay with friends during this time until the situation is resolved.

It’s also important for them to understand that not always responding to provocations and walking away can be an effective strategy to defuse the situation in some cases.

Confrontation Strategies

Beyond judgment and for the sake of thoroughness, I should also mention that some parents believe that life is a battle. They think their child needs to stand up to their aggressor and that this dynamic will toughen them up for life.

We are navigating the waters of "an eye for an eye," and I won’t discuss the pros and cons here because violence is not a solution in itself. However, sometimes, to survive against an aggressor, it’s undeniable that one must fight back and not allow themselves to become a passive victim.

However, it may be important to remind the child to show restraint in their response, only defending themselves and clearly asserting their boundaries when they are violated.

Maintaining Continuous Vigilance

Even after a bullying incident seems resolved, remain vigilant. Observe your child’s behavior to detect any signs of lingering distress, such as isolation or declining academic performance.

Continue to encourage open communication and reinforce the idea that you are there for them, no matter the problem.

Ask teachers to be vigilant, even though some schools might prefer to bury their heads in the sand. To counter this, the best solution is to talk about the problem as early as possible when it is still in its early stages. When the problem becomes very serious or could have legal consequences, institutions often try to cover it up or minimize it, sometimes taking actions that seem absurd in the face of the situation.

It’s important to act and talk about it as soon as the problem arises. It’s much easier to contain and resolve a situation that’s still in its early stages than one that has been ongoing for several months.