Let’s delve into some mechanisms that should be implemented to evaluate advice, even when it might have been better not to ask for it in the first place.

The act of giving and receiving advice across all domains has become a societal norm. Our brains, inherently lazy, are wired to seek shortcuts. Five thousand years ago, roles were clearly defined, and career paths were set from birth. Today, in an overstimulated environment, with demands for immediacy and optimized lives, we are pushed even further toward all-encompassing efficiency.

I’m borrowing from a discussion I had in the comments section recently, as some of these exchanges deserve to be full-fledged posts.

Some advice carries minimal consequences, while for others, sorting through it becomes much more complex. Evaluating advice properly requires critical thinking to assess its validity, projecting potential outcomes to consider short- and long-term effects, gaining perspective by taking a step back to analyze the context, questioning perceptions (both your own and those of the person giving the advice), understanding motivations behind the advice, and emotional intelligence to navigate the emotional undercurrents of both giving and receiving advice.

If we were to truly explore all the nuances, the list would be overwhelming. It might take a saga as long as Harry Potter to dissect it all.

Lucid and pertinent evaluation of advice is not a skill everyone possesses. This raises a logical objection: “But if the same advice is given by multiple people, doesn’t that mean it’s worth considering and deciding how to act on it?”

This argument is tempting. However, it depends.

It’s crucial to distinguish between training or education and advice, and to consider the level of personal relevance.

For example, if ten people suggest you invest in cryptocurrency, that doesn’t necessarily mean it’s sound advice. Proximity to the source of advice—friends or acquaintances—should not automatically be a criterion for trust. Just because the advice comes from friends doesn’t mean it’s inherently more reliable.

Several cognitive biases come into play when it comes to perceived trust: the bias of assumed trustworthiness, where we tend to trust advice from familiar sources without questioning its merit, and the authority bias, as we are often influenced by perceived expertise or authority. I’m preparing a separate article on this topic.

In today’s world, navigating the economy of advice requires more than just listening and acting. It calls for a mix of skepticism, critical thinking, and emotional awareness. Recognizing the underlying motivations, biases, and implications behind every piece of advice can help us make more informed, deliberate decisions. After all, not all advice is created equal—and not all advice is worth following.

It’s like the concept of “whiter than white.” Among all the unique individuals out there, you’re being told everywhere that you’re somehow even more unique.

In personal development or career transitions, we agree that the foundational message is: You are unique! And rightfully so... we all are.

But there’s a kind of creative blur when it comes to defining multipotentiality, which conveniently allows for the creation of offers marketed to make everyone feel included.

There’s no precise theoretical basis. Essentially, according to its creator, multipotentialites are “people with lots of passions and creative interests.” Cool, but it’s a catch-all definition.

Now that so many people feel they fit into this category, what are we witnessing?

A drift in training programs, because the “right way” to save a multipotentialite is to allow them to combine everything they care about.
But who decided this?
Worse still, if it doesn’t work, are we talking about falling into an abyss of despair?

Here lies a dangerous confusion between “what I am” and “what I should want.”

Observation 1:

I have lots of passions, and I love them.

Observation 2:

Oh, someone tells me I’m a multipotentialite. Really? Cool!

Situation:

I’m bored in my job.

Conclusion:

I’m told it’s normal because I’m “multi,” and the solution is to find a way to combine everything.

But here’s the problem: this idea was thought up for you based on almost nothing.

I have an issue with the narrative of “You are, and therefore you must…”—it feels invasive, even aggressive. This kind of influence creeps into everything:

• “You have an extraordinary, untapped potential…”
• “You’re so lucky to have so many passions…”

And the worst one:

• “You have everything it takes, but you’re doing nothing with it—it’s frustrating. If only you could channel it all!”

Really? Untapped? From whose perspective? Why is it even considered a “gift”?

When it comes to frustration, everyone will identify with this narrative depending on their personal situation.

The reality of the concept

Based on its current state, you could take almost any human who, through life’s circumstances, ends up with multiple interests they’ve invested in to develop skills and—bam!—you have a multipotentialite.

Making people believe and reinforcing this label, only to guilt-trip them for not doing enough with it, or for not even realizing it was a “problem” to begin with, is shameful. It makes me angry.

And those who claim they want to help often base their solutions on the simplistic idea that your hobbies or passions will dictate your life choices (and they usually mention this outright).

This kind of narrative is reductive and painfully narrow-minded.

Multipotentialites and career transitions

Multipotentialites, like anyone else, face choices in their transitions. And like all choices, these decisions exist within a broader system—a context that includes personality traits, a range of skills, and many other factors.

Let’s stop pretending that multipotentiality is a “problem” to solve and acknowledge that choices are about much more than hobbies or labels.

No, we’re not going to dive into a sociological study to explain this, but rather address the reality: instead of anticipating, you find yourself in an urgent situation, having waited and hoped the problem would somehow resolve itself.

95% of my clients over the past 20 years share this trait. And it’s not just about career or academic guidance—it applies to that small ache in your hip or that leaky sink trap too.

It’s funny how we tend to avoid looking problems in the face, fail to notice them creeping in, or think that acknowledging them might make them worse. Maybe it’ll grow, take up too much space, exist more prominently, or even escalate. In short, thinking about it and finding solutions—or implementing them—is just annoying.

No, naming a problem doesn’t make it bigger.
Naming a problem doesn’t make it more important. (Well, only in your head.)
But yes, naming a problem makes it exist more clearly.
And wouldn’t it be better to address the early signs right away, before it turns into a full-blown crisis?

Here’s the thing about crises: if you let them grow, they start affecting everything else.

An undecided student without a career plan? Same process.
An employee suffocating at work? Same story.

Sometimes, the solution at this stage only requires a small adjustment.

But if you wait until it becomes debilitating, it’ll require drastic measures. At that point, it’s no longer about making minor tweaks.

So why do you wait until problems consume you from the inside out?
Burying your head in the sand isn’t more economical—it’s the exact opposite.

Ask yourself: why do you wait until the last minute, the point of no return?

That last-minute save might look cool in "The A-Team." (And if you don’t get the reference, I really don’t know what to say! 😉)

"Keeping All Doors Open": Reflecting on the Biggest Nonsense Ever

Imagine yourself in a hallway with 1,000 open doors. What do you do? No, seriously, close your eyes and imagine it. Yeah, like the stock photo that makes an article more engaging (except I don’t use those on my site).

So? What’s the verdict? Is it overwhelming?

Exactly. Walking down that hallway is what you usually advise your bright and shining young adult.

And as if that weren’t enough of a problem, here’s the bad news: you’re probably shooting yourself in the foot, too.

Sure, in 9th grade, sticking to general education tracks seems fine. It’s the dream of every ambitious parent.

But here’s the issue: by senior year, it’s just a trap.

The strategy is to keep going and figure it out later? It’s “too early,” they’re “not ready”? I call that the ostrich policy.

The "I’m Keeping My Options Open" syndrome is like saying, “I’ll learn every language in the world so I’m not limited in my future travels.”
Or dreaming of being an entrepreneur but waiting years for the perfect idea to strike.

Here’s the twist: by now, many doors have already closed.

And the real kicker? He’s enrolled in engineering school, or she’s studying communications (yes, I went there with gender roles), and no one really knows why they’re working so hard.
Not deeply, anyway.

Working just for the sake of working doesn’t work. So, sure, let’s throw in a need for “methodology” here, a bit of “organization” there... but the real issue lies elsewhere.

The Paradox That Kills Motivation

Picture this for a moment…

Scenario A: “I want to be the best pastry chef in the world!”
Scenario B: “I’m keeping all my options open. Maybe I’ll be a telecom engineer, a developer, or a Maine Coon breeder…” (shoutout to Miss Perez).

Now, the question: which one will wake up at 4 AM to practice making macarons?

And there lies the problem: no action, no validation of ideas, no prior experience in their backpack. They’ll stay stuck in their routine, discovering little beyond the latest level of Counter-Strike or the newest Zara jacket.
(Yes, I went gendered again. It’s deliberate—to point out how our lovely education system shapes individual identity in the dumbest ways.)

The Tough Question (That’s Good for You)

Conceptually, what do you prefer:

1. To have 1,000 open doors and remain in the hallway.
2. To pick ONE door and discover an entire world behind it.

What’s going to create drive?

The Little Secret No One Tells You

Here’s the irony: the more you excel in ONE direction, the more new doors open naturally. Steve Jobs didn’t “keep his options open”—he obsessively pursued his vision. And look where it led him! (Granted, he didn’t have a pocket screen buzzing constantly.)

Today’s Challenge

I have a simple yet powerful exercise for you. Yep, I just dropped the magic word: powerful.

Take five minutes (seriously, time yourself) and have them write this:
“In an ideal world, without any constraints, I would be...”

Not “I could be,” not “I might consider being,” but “I would be.”

Are they stuck?

You know what to do.

It’s never too late to choose THEIR door.

Our ability to choose wisely begins with a fundamental question: are we our best ally when it comes to decision-making?

Before answering that, we’d first need to be in control. Yet, between cognitive biases and choices driven by emotions, it’s not always easy to bring reason into the process. And it’s not just my opinion—it’s backed by science.

But no, I’m not talking about choosing between strawberry or chocolate ice cream.

Isn’t it easier to strategize for others than it is for ourselves?

Are we sometimes our own worst saboteur when faced with tough choices?

An external perspective can be invaluable—but not just any perspective. I don’t believe Aunt Raymonde is the best person to help us decide whether to integrate AI into our workflow.

We often turn to people in our circles whom we consider “knowledgeable,” imagining them to be impartial and well-intentioned. Ah, perceptions…

The ideal is to approach these decisions with someone who’s truly neutral, someone who understands their own emotions, biases, and tendencies—and knows how to manage them so they don’t interfere. Someone whose role is to tell you everything, no sugarcoating, someone who minimizes their influence on you and knows how to do so. Someone who considers every obstacle but, more importantly, understands the entire system—your mindset, the context—and is committed to finding your solutions.

But in moments like these, when the stakes are high, what you’re looking for is something even more than that.

First off, there are no such things as “powerful” questions—let’s leave that nonsense to the “impactfluencers.”

The nature of questioning is what can make all the difference. Your goal is to master the art of it! This works not only for guiding your teenager but also for making career decisions.

For me, questioning my choices and evaluating options has been a way of life for over 30 years.

Questioning a decision is what makes the difference between a good choice and a poor one—not because of the outcome itself, but because it leads to accepting the outcome. The decision should be made only after exploring all its implications.

That’s the ideal, and it’s what you should aim for. To do this, you need to dig in every possible direction as deeply as you can.

So let’s take a quick look at different types of questions:

Clarifying Questions:

• What do you mean by...?
• What is your main challenge?
• What is the connection between... and...?
• How does this relate to our problem/discussion?

Assumption-Based Questions:

• What are you assuming?
• It sounds like you’re assuming that... Am I understanding you correctly?
• Your entire reasoning relies on the idea that... Why base your reasoning on... instead of...?
• You seem to assume that... What makes you think that’s true?
• Is this always the case? Why are you taking this assumption as a given?

Reason and Evidence Questions:

• How does this apply to our case?
• What would you say to someone who argues that...?
• What reasoning led you to this conclusion?

Questions on Opinions or Points of View:

• What do you conclude from that?
• If that were to happen, what would the consequences be? Why?
• What impact could this have?
• Is there an alternative?

Implication and Consequence Questions:

• How can we find out if...?
• Would someone else frame this question differently?
• According to you, what will happen? If that’s true, what could it change or produce?

Strategic Questions:

• Before answering this question, what other questions should we address first?
• Why should we answer these questions in this order, and how would that change things?
• Why is this topic important?

Don’t limit yourself to this list; research, reflect, and train yourself as you would for any other skill.

Once a question is asked, pursue understanding by following up and delving into what they’ve said. Ask for clarification, go deeper, and explore further.

Want to apply this to yourself? Do the same.

Your one goal: Seek precision; work toward something concrete. Your teenager should write down everything you discover together through discussion.

Enough with introductions—let’s get to action. This is the real issue: the financial hit you’ll take if your child decides to change direction. And as we discussed previously, there’s a 40% chance this will happen.

Your Ideal Stance: I don’t care what my kid wants to do. This can be tough, but Coué’s method (positive self-suggestion) might help.

Your Mindset: They have to convince me to give them €15,000 for their plan.

With these two prerequisites, you’re in the right frame of mind to dig below the surface. There are other factors, but these are a great start. Here, I’m talking about truly coaching your child—no tests involved—with an approach that is as focused on them as possible. This method encourages responsibility, independence, and active involvement in their decisions.

How to Dig Deeper into Generic Statements?

• “I want to help people later on!”
• “I want a job that interests me!”
• “I want to work with nice people.”

These kinds of vague ambitions don’t lead anywhere. Sound familiar? You may have heard phrases like these (or others) before.

You need to aim for ultra-precision! So, how do you turn these general aspirations into something concrete?

The Key? The Art of Asking the Right Questions to Your Teen!

Here are three types of questions for more meaningful discussions:

Questions to Clarify Their Thinking:

• “When you say ‘help people,’ what do you specifically mean?”
• “What do you see as the most important aspect of a job?”

Questions to Challenge Their Assumptions:

• “What makes you think that would be the right choice?”
• “Have you considered other ways to achieve that goal?”

Questions to Deepen Their Motivation:

• “How would you like to feel in your future job?”
• “What really matters to you, and why?”

It’s up to you to keep the conversation going and pull the thread to get to the core. Here’s a concrete example: “I want to help people.”

Don’t stop there! Engage in the discussion by creating context. A lawyer helps people, so does a developer, a teacher, a trainer, and a coach. Help your child define their unique vision of what it means to “help” and, most importantly, understand why they feel this way.

Remember, you should feel like you have a deep understanding or be completely convinced—as if they were pitching their project to you and asking for €15,000.

Would you give it to them at this point or not?

The Goal? To Help Them:

• Discover their true motivations
• Sharpen their thinking
• Imagine a concrete future
• Build a plan that truly fits them

Ideally, you should learn different types of questions, think about their impact, and practice asking open, non-judgmental questions that don’t guide their answers.

Or maybe flipping a coin—it all depends on your preference. Career assessments may look serious and structured on the surface, but they actually mask complex issues that few people fully understand. The process largely relies on tests followed by a consultation to explain the results and recommend career paths. Let’s break this down into three key points.

A Worrying Lack of Standards Among Advisors

There is no regulatory framework for career assessments, meaning:

• No standards for the tests used
• No oversight of assessment practices
• No minimum training requirements

Proper questioning skills are rarely applied in standard career assessments due to time constraints. And when they are used, even well-intentioned but unskilled advisors can unconsciously:

• Guide the student’s thinking in a pre-set direction
• Show limited openness in their questioning
• Overlook critical areas that need deeper exploration
• Miss underlying beliefs that need to be challenged
• Subtly influence the student’s answers At a minimum, these issues can deeply impact the assessment’s value.

The Complexity of Career-Related Questions

There are many types of questions used in professional assessments. Without diving into each type—since you can find these online with your preferred AI—here’s a sampling: open-ended, closed, leading, alternative, control, diversion, challenging, motivating, suggestive questions, and interrogative responses. Each type can shape the conversation in distinct ways.

Misleading Package Names and Processes

Here’s a quick example: the BIOP website, a service run by the Paris Chamber of Commerce (accessed in 2010, and I have a screenshot for proof if needed) stated: “The career guidance specialist assisting you with your career assessment will ensure you take orientation and personality tests selected based on your personal and/or academic situation.”

A customized “career and personality test” tailored to your unique needs sounds impressive, but it’s an empty promise—there’s no such thing.

Is the Pyramid Method Relevant?

Whether it’s an assessment or general advice, you’ll likely be offered a pyramid method that, frankly, doesn’t add much value. For context, this pyramid method is almost identical to that used in skills assessments.

The pyramid approach addresses these areas without much probing:

• Your academic level
• Your strengths/weaknesses (often based on the RIASEC or MBTI personality models at work)
• Your competencies
• Your interests

In itself, it’s restrictive but perhaps workable. The problem is the lack of genuine exploration. Structuring a career guidance method around these elements alone is conceptually and structurally reductive, if not outright misguided.

It appears these professionals ignore crucial aspects of the question at hand because accounting for them would make the process too long and too costly. Can we assume they’re acting in good faith and simply haven’t considered this? Or perhaps they lack the clarity to include it?

After all:

• Knowledge or academic level can be improved through effort.
• Character or “soft skills” can be developed.
• Skills can be learned through experience.

So, what is the point of their services if they don’t take this into account?

When a Service Ignores Client Needs, It’s Usually Due to:

1. Lack of empathy (think basic reflection, design thinking, etc.)
2. Practical limitations
3. An unfavorable cost-to-benefit ratio

If the majority of people are poorly guided, it’s because providing a standardized and intelligent approach to career support is too costly, and clients aren’t willing to pay for the level of service needed. There’s a need, and the problem is immense, yet few people can or want to pay to solve it properly, as the consequences aren’t immediate.

It’s like smoking—lung cancer isn’t for another 20 years. We’ll worry about it when the time comes.